I identify as a female human being. I also identify as a gamer—someone who has spent, and continues to spend, a significant portion of her life playing video games. But does that make me a girl gamer? A gamer girl? Is there even a difference?
The “Gamer Girl” Label
Labels are a funny thing. Depending on who is being labeled, who is doing the labeling, and the intention behind it, a label can be a source of intense pride or joy—or it can trigger abject shame, sorrow, or even rage.
For example, “geek” used to be a disparaging term until people began wearing it like a badge of honor, taking back the term and spinning it into something positive. Nowadays, it’s often used neutrally—so many people now identify as geeks that the term has lost its teeth.
But what about “girl gamer” vs. “gamer girl”?
According to the dictionary.com entry, “gamer girl” is slang for “a female video game enthusiast.” Simple enough, but the dictionary is quick to offer a caution: “sometimes disparaging.” In the past, gamer girl has been used all too often as an insult by carrying one of the following implied meanings:
- A female person who games—and who, by virtue of being female, is inherently less skillful or more casual about gaming than the “traditional” male gamer
- A female person who wears the “gamer” label like camouflage to attract attention, but isn’t honestly interested in (or serious about) gaming
In short, the term “girl gamer” was meant to differentiate female players from “real gamers”—male players, of course. This binary—which does nothing to help nonbinary and trans members of the gaming community feel more welcome, by the way—is just one of many symptoms of ye olde misogyny this and other modern communities are still trying to shake.
I think there’s hope, though, that this label will go the way of “geek” as it evolves over time. Already, I’ve seen female-identifying gamers use it to describe themselves with pride—as if to say, “Yes, I am a female, and I am a gamer, and I’m here whether the misogynists like it or not.” (I am one such “gamer girl.”)
The “Girl Gamer” Alternative
The term “girl gamer,” as far as I’ve seen, is less prevalent and carries less of a negative connotation—though of course just about any label can be used insultingly in the wrong hands.
Some like it as a safe alternative to calling someone a gamer girl, a way to identify someone as a female player without implying that they are faking their level of gaming skill or interest. Others see girl gamer (vs. gamer girl) as equally problematic, if not more so—putting “girl” first puts more emphasis on the person’s gender than the fact that they play games, often in a context where gender should be irrelevant.
Others still point out that both are problematic simply because of the word “girl.” Many of us female gamers would, in fact, be more accurately described as “gamer women.” And just as many who could technically fall under the girl gamer/gamer girl umbrella might prefer not to gender themselves at all.
Girl Gamer vs. Gamer Girl—Why Does it Matter?
Personally, there’s little difference to me whether someone calls me a girl gamer vs. a gamer girl. If someone uses it insultingly, that says much worse things about them than it does about me.
Yes, I am a female player, and yes, I do love video games. I call myself a gamer girl sometimes (and use the hashtag often on Instagram), in part to reclaim the label and in part because I’m proud to help represent the female population of an industry that has not historically been welcoming to us. The more visible female and nonbinary members of the community become, the sooner we can finally put that image of the “traditional” gamer as being a male gamer where it belongs—six feet under in that creepy junkyard from Detroit: Become Human.
But it’s important to know that some people see it differently. Many individuals have suffered because of the stigmas that gave terms like “gamer girl” and “girl gamer” their negative connotations, and to pretend otherwise is to be obstinately blind.
At the end of the day, the most important thing is for gamers to recognize gamers—of any gender, background, history, and so on. Video games, like movies and books and just about any other media you can think of, are non-exclusive forms of entertainment. People from all walks of life should have the freedom to play their favorite games without judgment, regardless of the other ways in which they may or may not identify themselves.
As for me? Consider me your friendly neighborhood gamer girl. Or girl gamer. Or, you know, just gamer. (Or better yet, Commander Shepard.) I don’t care. I’ll be too busy blasting my way through the next game on my to-play list—and having the time of my life while I’m at it.
Kim Berkley is a girl gamer (or gamer girl, whatever) who also makes games for a living. Her published works include interactive fiction games such as The Harbinger’s Head and chiaroscuro.
